It's not what you know, it's what you show!

A very wise colleague of mine shared the above title line with me this past week. What a life saver! This is not only good advice for my students, but it's a good principal to follow in general (me included). I guess this phrase falls under "actions speak louder than words" and other such cliches that help us make it through life. The thing is, they really are true!

My motto in class this year has been "No Shortcuts", but I like the above tag line too. Integrity is everything. As a teacher I expect my students to perform and behave with the utmost integrity. Not that I already don't, but I myself should keep in line with that advice and most importantly model those valuable characteristics daily. It is difficult. It's often much easier to just lecture them instead of asking them "Here's the problem... (state the problem). Now, how do you plan to fix this?"

I have quickly come to the realization that while our students must do their best regarding academics, we as parents, teachers, and leaders of our community must teach them to make WISE LIFE CHOICES. I would love to have an elective class where I was able to do such a thing. 45 minutes of focused encouragement and life strategies. Wow - that would be empowering! Today's kids are more empowered than ever, just not in the right way. They are more often NOT empowered with the skills that will make them positive, productive members of society.

Life is not a dress rehearsal and we must live each day as it is... simply a fleeting moment. We should ask ourselves at the end of each day, "What could I have done differently today for someone else and lastly for myself?" I have only 3 months left with my students this year. What will I do differently over those 3 months that will leave a lasting and positive effect on their lives? At this very moment, I'm not sure, but I know that if is it to be... it is up to me.

I pray that my optimism doesn't fade this week.

Egg Shells

Is it the nature of the beast? Why does teaching feel like you are always walking around on egg shells. We must be considerate of students, parents, colleagues, and administrators. We do our best to encourage, mentor, and "lay it all out there" without putting our foot in our mouth. It's enough to make a person crazy! I have certainly learned (and I'm still learning) what to and not to say. That is an extremely difficult thing for someone who is open and wears their heart on their sleeve.

I often find myself wondering (or is it worrying?) -- did I say too much, too little or worse yet - the wrong thing?! Sometimes I wonder was I too harsh or too soft (I tend to lean the way of the former)? I always considered myself a fairly reasonable and diplomatic person with a little bit of sensitivity thrown in. Lately, I constantly ask myself if I'm being reasonable.

Kids have fragile hearts and minds, but at the same time can really turn the tables to try to get things to swing their way. Parents are either on your side or they are not. This I truly understand as I am a parent myself. All other people sometimes fall into the category of "not doing things against you but for themselves". I really do try not to take it all personally. As they say, "business is business" or in our case "education is education".

The thing is, I care so deeply for all my students, their success in my class, and their future. I know better than anyone what's coming around the bend and I pray they'll be ready. However, I need to remember that I'm not their parent - I'm their teacher. This is not easy for me. I'm such a "mom" and Lord knows, teenagers don't need another parent.

I think - and someone tell me if I'm wrong - the best policy is to always be honest and say as little as possible. I guess I should live and die by this policy! Will it ever be easy or become second nature? I sure hope so. It has to... I believe in my students and myself.

Am I doing all I can? How do you motivate a brick wall?

Let's see... I plan daily, grade daily, tutor twice weekly, keep an extensive classroom website, and rarely take lunch or restroom breaks. What do I see for all my efforts? Most of my students are doing well. Then there are those who SHOULD do well - but repeatedly fail.

Why is this? They are not idiots. They are capable of doing the work (and getting help if they need it). What makes an easy thing so difficult for some? Turning in "quality" work, ON TIME is my biggest pet peeve right now. How hard is it to get it in on time? My students rarely get an enormous amount of math problems to solve. They get a select few daily .. 20 minutes worth of true effort.

Sometimes I wonder if the fault lies with me. Then I look at the grades and see that most are doing well and have no trouble getting work in on time. So, I guess it's not 100% me. So, what's the answer. How do we, as teachers, motivate those students who are no more lively or care than a brick wall? I have certainly not found the answer. Perhaps it will come in time. Perhaps it will never come to me. I will never give up, but I sure do feel defeated some days. It scares me too. These are the people who will one day be "running our country". Will they get it together soon? Will some other teacher be able to light a fire under their feet? I hope that for some, I am that one teacher who inspires them. For others, I hope that I am able to plant a few seeds that other teachers can nurture and bloom.

Well, tomorrow is another day. I look forward to new opportunities and challenges and hope I have the strength and creativity to meet them both.

Teacher of the Year (TOY)

This week our campus held TOY nominations. We all submit our nominations and then we vote. Sometimes a run-off is needed. I always feel weird. How do you know who to nominate and for what reasons? Is it right to nominate yourself? Does it mean you're a crappy teacher if you don't even get nominated? Is it really a popularity contest or do people see you for the good you are trying to do.

I just wonder because I'm not sure how I feel about being or not being selected as a TOY. On one hand, it would feel great to think my colleagues felt I was worthy. On the other, would being awarded TOY really give me fulfillment as a teacher?

I must say we have some great teachers on our voting ballot this year. Only two from my grade level (not me of course). There are those who I think will always make the list.... We are a small school, so there are only so many of us. The good thing I suppose, is that we really do get to know each other, support each other, and constructively guide one another.

Ultimately, I am ok with not receiving TOY designation. I do hope however, that I make a positive impact on my students and that it shows to their parents and my colleagues. I guess I don't need an award to know I'm doing a super job.

Whatever happened to personal responsibility?

It wasn't until I turned 30, that I truly understood the meaning "personal responsiblity". Oh sure, I've always been considered "the responsible one", but when you only have yourself to worry about, you don't think too much of other peoples' responsiblity. What I am learning as a teacher (wife and mother), is that most young people have no idea what personal responsiblity means. There are some that are great -- you never have to tell them who, what, when, where, why or how. They are always two steps ahead. The rest expect you to hold their hand and be the one to follow through for them. Did I miss the boat? It there a law or some code written somewhere that states young people don't have to follow through and take responsibility for their actions, their learning, and their future? Maybe I'm just getting old. Perhaps I expect too much from middle school students. Perhaps some deep rooted regret plays out as some kind of "do as I ask, not as I did and messed up" psych problem of mine.

Is is unreasonable to expect students to turn in QUALITY work ON TIME? Is is unreasonable to expect them to ask questions when they are stumped (instead of putting it aside and giving up)? Is is unreasonable to expect them to actively participate in class and not goof off?

Yes and no. While it is not unreasonable for me to expect them to meet these high standards, I must remember they are ultimately just children. Children want to laugh and play. To dream, and be free from drudgery. They want to love and be loved. They simply want to live life as if there was no tomorrow to worry about. Their world revolves around happiness.

Perhaps I can tap into their need for laughing, playing, dreaming, happiness and love. Perhaps I can use what makes them so wonderful (and so frustrating at the same time) to help them become wonderful young adults. If I could only harness their liveliness, passions, and ways of thinking, I might be able to create a "cool" class they can't get enough of... perhaps one day.

Why do we become teachers?

I came across a photo of a young girl not too long ago. She looked to be about four to five years of age. This girl, with auburn hair in a ponytail, held a cute smile and a clipboard in hand. This girl was a smiling because at the age of four or five, she knew her destiny – to be a teacher. This girl was me.

Even at the young age of four, I wanted to become a teacher. I would play “teacher” for hours in my room with stuffed animals and dolls lined up in rows on the floor. These were my students, patiently waiting with baited breath for my next lesson. Some of my fondest memories are of the days I spent in school. To this day, I can still remember the name of my Kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Stevens, and even what she looked like. Over the years, I still played “school” in the solitude of my room, never wanting my friends to know for fear of being laughed right out of town. There are several teachers that remain in my minds eye and in my heart the best teachers in the world. Mr. Karoly and Mrs. Parker are my two favorites. I would love to find them and treat them to lunch and share how much they impacted my life.

So, why do we become teachers? Is it for the low pay, unmotivated students, overbearing parents, legal and political battles? No, I would venture to say that some become teachers because they want to change the world. Others do so because it offers promise of job security. Some simply have a passion about something and they just want to share that knowledge with others. I became a teacher for all those reasons. I wanted a fairly stable job with consistent, dependable income (even though it could be higher), family-friendly hours, and the opportunity to share just a little of the wisdom I’ve learned over the years with my students. Curriculum would be the catalyst for sharing this wealth of knowledge. My fiery passion for knowledge would keep me motivated and if I was lucky, I just might make a small yet positive impact on those that would hopefully change the world.

What I did not expect to become part of my reasons for teacher, were smiling faces hiding fragile hearts. Sharp minds struggling to conform to socially accepted norms, while cultivating their own independence. Young teens, in their zeal to become adults overnight, are teaching me the joys of childhood again. In the eighteen months since I have become a classroom teacher, I have encountered and endured many smiles, tears, triumphs, struggles, and a daily reminder of why I did indeed choose to become a teacher. I will never be rich, famous, or change the world. I will however, be but a brief and hopefully bright moment in the lives of people I am counting on to become rich, famous, or more importantly... change the world.

Sometimes you get a break!

Believe it or not, sometimes you get a break! The note below (in red) was a VERY unexpected email my Principal sent to my former boss at our Administration building. I worked for the district in administration before I got my teaching job. I was cc'd on the email and it really made my day! Still trying to find and keep my footing during my second year of teaching... parents are the worst downers. Then you hear about those parents to send kudos about you to your boss. I know I made the right career choice.... crap and all. It's been a wild ride so far. I look forward to getting more proficient at delivering instruction and managing all the paperwork, etc. that goes with teaching.

"With all of the discussion going on today, I was remiss in sharing a few more things with you about XXXXXXX. Not only does she do an outstanding job of communicating with parents via her website, I've had a lot of compliments from parents. One particularly difficult parent told me last year that XXXXXXX was the best math teacher her daughter has had since her schooling began. The parent has since followed up with me to let me know that her daughter has had success so far in high school as a result of XXXXXXX's efforts. Another parent that was quite prone to criticism regarding math told me how both of her daughters are "breezing through" high school math purely because of XXXXXXX's efforts. I concur that she is outstanding. Thank you for encouraging her to go into teaching!! She has and will continue to make a significant difference in the lives of many. I know that you took a significant loss, but bless you for being willing to share her talents!! I am thankful to have her as part of our team!"

Great quotes found on another blog... just what I needed today!

• If a doctor, lawyer, or dentist had 40 people in his office at one time, all of whom had different needs, and some of whom didn't want to be there and were causing trouble, and the doctor, lawyer, or dentist, without assistance, had to treat them all with professional excellence for nine months, then he might have some conception of the classroom teacher's job. ~Donald D. Quinn
• Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those to whom they entrust the minds of their children a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom they entrust the care of their plumbing. ~John F. Kennedy
• We expect teachers to handle teenage pregnancy, substance abuse, and the failings of the family. Then we expect them to educate our children. ~John Sculley
• Teaching is the only major occupation of man for which we have not yet developed tools that make an average person capable of competence and performance. In teaching we rely on the "naturals," the ones who somehow know how to teach. ~Peter Drucker
• Teachers are expected to reach unattainable goals with inadequate tools. The miracle is that at times they accomplish this impossible task. ~Haim G. Ginott
• The only reason I always try to meet and know the parents better is because it helps me to forgive their children. ~Louis Johannot
• If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I'll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home. ~Anonymous Teacher

Middle School Math

I have been a middle school math teacher for a year-and-a-half at a wonderful school in Texas. Having always wanted to write a book, I figured this was a pretty good place to start. Maybe one day, my adventures in middle school will make for a great published work!